Is it just me or are millennials waiting longer than ever to move out of their parents’ homes? Don’t get me wrong, it’s commendable to want to save as much money as you can before you take that huge leap into adulthood. But, at what cost? Are parents basically enabling their children to be lazy, ungrateful big people?
I find that I’m witnessing more and more young adults still being treated like small children. They get their laundry done for them, their meals cooked for them, and best of all — they live rent free in a warm, protective nest with mom and dad.
Just living the life — ammiright?
I knew quite early on that I couldn’t live with my parents forever — nor did I want to. I also knew that I wanted to settle down in my 20’s and start a family well before my 30th birthday. So, needless to say, I wasn’t like many young adults my age. And that’s exactly what happened. I got married at 24 and had my first child at 26. I wasn’t living under the roof or rules of my parents anymore.
I’m incredibly happy that I left when I did. I find that a lot of people my age still live with their parents, rent free, but don’t even know how to load a dishwasher (yes, it’s true). And although moving out meant that my husband and I would have to pay for everything with no reliance on parents, we were confident that we would still be able to purchase a home one day without giving up our souls in the process.
Sometimes you have to live like no one else today, so you can live like no one else tomorrow.
We live in Toronto, Canada, which means that, next to Vancouver, we live in the second most expensive city to own a home. I think I read a recent article that said home prices in the city were rising by over $500 a day in the summer. (Say whattttt?)
We could probably get a big fat loan and spend the rest of our lives paying off a house we theoretically can’t afford. Or we can live like no one else today so we can live like no one else tomorrow — and that means moving out of the city I’ve grown to love and into a smaller town outside of the city where home prices are more reasonable. Somewhere we can pay 1/4 of the cost of a small, shitty house in the city, and get ourselves a cozy, country home.
And what does this do? For starters, it allows us to not make a deal with the devil, and potentially get ourselves in hot water for buying a million dollar home. It also allows us to pay off our house in half the time than it will take other millenials to do. It lets us save more money because we are not paying a huge monthly mortgage payment. It lets us spend more time together, happy, rather than stressing over paying all of our bills. It allows us to get out of the concrete circus that is the city, and into fresh air, green spaces and outdoor activities. No more pollution, loud sirens at 3 in the morning or drunken crazies stumbling in the hallway looking for their keys.
Can I get an amen?
I think the fact that we still don’t live with our parents, trying to save money for that perfect house, has shaped us into strong, independent people who know the value of a buck. I think that navigating our own paths into adulthood has made us more resilient, grateful and unstoppable.
So, now we are on a quest to live debt free as soon as possible. To say i’m over the mortgage and car payments (which we don’t have) and say yes, we’re free before reaching this heaven-like period of life called “retirement” (which we don’t believe in).
So, yes we will live as minimally as possible, outside of the city, and pay off that house as soon as we can muster. Because we’re determined to not live a life attached to the leash of the big banks — at least not for 25 damn years. Is that a long time or what?
I don’t know about you, but I actually want to spend the days I have left with my family, happy, stress-free, in our warm little nest. And I’ll have a heck of a time loading that dishwasher every day. No parental assistance necessary.